It’s 11:34 p.m. and I can’t sleep. What’s up with that? But being restless always get’s my mind going about things to write about. I should keep a book by my bed at night. However, every time I think about it I also tell myself “are you crazy? You wouldn’t get up even if you wanted too.” And it’s true. When you’re laying in bed, after a long day, your pillow sounds 10x better than a pen and paper.
So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate. -Matthew 19:6
I’ve always felt on edge when I talk about my past. And now that I’m a Pastor’s wife I feel even a little more on edge. But a good friend of mine recently told me how I should never be ashamed of my past for my past is my testimony. God has taught me so much from my past, my mess ups and I how I have grown as a Christan woman in that strength.
When The Husband and I first meet in college (English class), I was 19. The Husband got me a job at the bar he was working at, and shortly after, we started dating. You can say we were living a life full of parties, alcohol, and more parties. I’m not sure how we made it to school on some days. But within the second month of us dating we got pregnant. I was 19, pregnant, with a man I’d just started dating and I was scared.
God had a plan!
We were young, dumb and in love. But love alone doesn’t prepare you for a child.
Because of this precious baby, I had growing inside me I knew I had to change. I knew it was time to go back to church. I knew the life I was living was not ok for a mom. I wanted better for our child. I wanted our child to grow up in church, around family and most of all to know God!
The Husband and I had a long talk about our future. We started going back to church, stopped having sex, got pre-marital counseling and got married on September 26th, 2009 a short 6 months after I found out I was pregnant.
God had a plan!
On December 17, 2009, that precious baby was born. Nolan rocked my world and turned it upside down and because of that I grew closer and closer to God, I have three beautiful children and a Husband that not only loves the Lord but loves me.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that no matter what you’re going through in life, God has a plan. A good plan. The struggles are real. We have had our ups and downs. However, God had and still has a plan. And because of that precious baby boy, I found the love of my life. God saved us through him. God knew what he was doing when he was creating Nolan inside me and to this day I am grateful for that blessing.
Never give up, trust in God and He will guide you.