Erica's Walk

Walking through life one day at a time

The 5’s of Marriage; Happy Anniversary to me :)

Today I celebrate 5 years of marriage. That’s 4 years longer than 90% of the people at my wedding probably thought my marriage would last. I know that is harsh to say but more than likely true. Jared and I had only been dating 2 weeks before we thought/talked about marriage. 2 months before I found out I was pregnant and 6 months before we said I do. I mean I know that More couples are cohabiting before marriage, but we just didn’t have the time to do that first and then see if marriage was the right thing for us. We just got married basically (although I’m not complaining).
A lot of factors came into my marriage. I was 19 when we got married. He was 26. Both still in school and not quite sure where our lives headed, not to mention I was pregnant. SO I decided to share with you today the “5’s” of my marriage. From both Jared and I.
Before I get started on the 5’s of our marriage let me first say that we by no means have the best marriage and we do fight just like normal people. Marriage is not easy and is not just playing house. Marriage can be hard at times and the best at times.

1. God always must come first.

Before getting married Jared and I decided that we wanted to get back into church and take marriage concealing. This rule was made the very first day and we have lived by it our whole marriage. We teach our children to put God first. It is the most important part of our marriage and i’m not sure where we would be if it weren’t for God in our lives.
Exodus 20:1-26









And God spoke all these words, saying, “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. “You shall have no other gods before me. “You shall not make for yourself a carved image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me,







2. No skipping church.
This was a rule that was made but not always kept and when it was not kept. We would always find ourselves fighting over some stupid reason. But for the past 1.5 years we have kept to this rule and the last 1.5 years have been the best in our marriage so far.

3. No sleeping on the couch.

Now this rule has not been an easy rule to keep. I know when i’m mad whether it be at Jared or for any reason at all I just want to be alone. Alone to cool down, think about whatever it is that made me mad and figure out how to fix it. Jared is the opposite. He love to talk things out which I actually works out because we talk/yell let each other know what happen and talk about how we can fix it. We have stayed up till 4 in the morning just talking and working things out.

4. Talk about our feelings.

Talking about my feeling is not easy for me nor is it easy for most people. But I have come to find out from letting Jared know how i’m feeling about something he did has turned out to be amazing. Because if you are unaware of this. Men tend to say things and mean something completely different. Jared would say something and not mean what I thought he meant and it would upset me. By me/us telling each other when things like this happen it stops a fight before it even starts. If you are finding that these fights are happening too often, and its almost impossible to communicate and talk about your feelings – dont give up. I know a lot of couples struggle with talking about how they feel, but this doesn’t mean you will never be able to do it. You might just need some help in opening up. Marriage counselling may be a solution that’s worth looking into. It sounds drastic, but it’s really not. A councellor will just help you to talk about your feelings as a couple, and that might revolutionise your relationship.

5. Put each others needs above our own.

This one was not hard for me but Jared had to learn.

1. There is no such thing as a perfect man or woman therefor marriage. Marriage is hard. Marriage is work.


2. Men like to fart, and take really long poo’s.

Yes you know what I mean. My husband loves to take his iPad, sit on the toilet and stay there for 45 min just because.

3. Sex does not happen every day.

For some reason, after you get married, have kids and get older, sex becomes a chore some days and a luxury others. Sometimes you’ll need things like sex toys or adult sites like hdpornvideo.xxx to bring back a bit of spice into the marriage bedroom. Masturbation is completely normal even if you are married, we must do more to make it feel less like a taboo topic to raise with your partner. You really shouldn’t let this problem destroy your marriage. Using a site like watchmygf xxx can really invigorate your lust for your partner.

4. You will not agree on everything. Especially when it comes to your children.

5. Your friends will change.

This one was hard for me. Your friends really do change whether its because you have babies or because you got married.

This picture was taken today. The start of 5 years of marriage… Many more to come…

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Comments

  1. Great rules. And the truths made me laugh! I'm a newly wed, but we've been together 6 years. Congratulations on such a beautiful and healthy family!

  3. I like rule one the best! As for sleeping on the couch, my husband slept on the recliner seat of the couch one night because he was sick and needed to sleep sitting up, and it was admittedly the best night of sleep I've had in a really long time. I didn't realize how much he woke me up in the night from movement and things until that night. No wonder I never feel rested. That's a lot different from sleeping there in anger though.

  4. Happy Anniversary! So much can change in 5 years but as long as your commitment to each other and to your family stays in the forefront then you will be able to weather whatever comes your way.

  5. Happy Anniversary! 🙂 It stinks that people out there try to tell you how your life is going to pan out – it seems like you guys are doing JUST fine and look at your beautiful little ones! 🙂 Love your truths! 🙂

  7. That's fabulous! My husband and I married quickly too (only 7 months after we got together) and some people were skeptical. We're on 4 years now. Only you know what is right for you. You have a beautiful family. Happy Anniversary!

  9. You are so right–marriage is HARD! I've definitely grown during our 4.5 years of marriage, and I know that we've grown as a couple during that time, too. The thing I had the hardest time with in the beginning is realizing that we couldn't ever stop trying to make our marriage work–ever. We'll hit 5 years in May, and we're hoping to keep growing in our relationship!

  10. Happy anniversary! I love this!! We're on 14 lol!!! We've been together since high school and people told us we'd never make it past senior year. One thing we do is when we're having a heated debate we hold hands. If we can't hold hands we aren't in the right frame of mind to talk to one another and make our point.

  15. Happy Anniversary to you and your husband. I think the talking about feelings is the most important rule, especially in our house. It's important to open up and share.

  21. Congrats and happy anniversary! Thanks for sharing and I totally agree with your 5's of Marriage! It's very true marriage is not playing house and isn't meant to be perfect.

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Living Life one day at a time

But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:15 Joshua 24:15

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24 Colossians 3:23-24

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Psalm 73:26 Psalm 73:26